Running Late For Another Update

Time is really flying by. I’ve been meaning to update this and the hours and days just go by. There’s never enough time. So many things to do, and some get pushed and pushed and pushed. This is unlike me. I like to be prompt and get shit done. I am not a procrastinator.

I just laid awake all night. And while I lay awake my mind doesn’t stop, I mean, whose does? So it just occurred to me, in just 10 short days from now, I finish chemo!!! Holy shit. After 1 year and 29 days, I’ll be finished with chemo. Fuck ya! I guess I just didn’t realize how close I was. I’m so excited for this door of my journey to be closing. After 25 chemo treatments, adios mother fucker. Time to get ready for the next phase in this walk. 

I went to my oncologist for chemo a week and a half ago. So more fucking not so great news. Not only is my thyroid out of whack where I added another medication to my regimen, but labs showed my liver levels (or whatever the term is for what’s out of range for your liver when it’s normal), is not functioning right. Are you fucking kidding me? I’ve gone through 24 mother fucking chemo treatments and NOW my liver is going to start having issues? Like fuck you. I don’t have time for this shit (just kidding, I totally do. Like WTF else do I do?). I would just prefer not to have to deal with any other parts of my body not functioning where they should be. Haven't I endured enough? Fuck me. I hope this is short lived. Just kind of a bump in the road. 

On the plus side, I dropped 4 pounds. Hell ya! Let’s get this body bikini ready. Lol. It’s going to be a long time before that shit happens. But it will happen! Once I wrap up with chemo and my thyroid gets on track, I should naturally start losing weight. I can’t wait. 

I’m super excited to keep it moving! I’m feeling pretty good these days and it’s such a relief. I am sleeping a lot though still which seems weird?!? But it makes sense. My body is being regularly poisoned, oh ya, that’s why I’m fucking tired. I think back to some of the shit I’ve gone through and I think, fuck those days. I am optimistic things are just going to get better from here, so stay tuned!

 

How Many Days Have Gone By?

It just occurred to me the other day that I have been going through chemo for over a year now. Wow. I missed my one year anniversary from when chemo started........that day came and went like many others, without missing a beat. You almost think I would have remembered that day, because I think it is significant. So many things have happened in that year.

To be exact, it has been 413 days since my diagnosis on January 26, 2022,  373 days since I started chemo on March 7, 2022, and 173 days since I had my double mastectomy on September 23, 2022. Shit. Time flies. I had my double mastectomy almost 6 months ago. I can't believe how quickly that time has gone by.

And with what I have gone through, and as far as I have come, I still have a long ways to go, but as time ticks by, I only have 83 days until my next surgery, the biggest one yet, my DIEP flap. Shit. I didn't realize it was sneaking up on me. It sure is. I look forward to getting that over with because I suspect that will be my hardest recovery yet. Time will tell. But not only do I have that surgery coming up, even closer to now, I only have 23 days until I will be done with chemo!!!

Less than 3 months to go before my next and largest hurdle. Do I have shit I need to wrap up in the meantime? Right now, who knows. Nothing I can think of aside from my regular appointments, with the exception of finishing up chemo, which will be great.

I went for blood work, to see if the cholesterol medication I started on 6 months ago is working. It is, and it is a really low dose. Awesome. But with good news, sometimes there's other shit. And it's just that. Shit. My thyroid is out of whack which can cause a whole lot of other issues, and it is. This may be a factor in my weight gain too, the doctor mentioned, which WTF ever. Steroids, and dysfunctional thyroid = weight gain. I don't honestly care, because I would rather be a bit fatter and have my life; cancer could have killed me, but it did not. So I'll take the weight gain in order to keep it moving.

So with all these things going on, and there always seems to be more and more, I will keep pushing forward, when I am not sleeping my 12 hours a night like I have been (I thought I was done with sleeping all those hours, but apparently not), so when I am not sleeping, I will just focus on feeling good, and taking things one day at a time.