Another week has passed. Another week of being sore, hurting and just being uncomfortable. OMG. Fuck this shit for real. It gets worse as time goes on. I have three of these treatments to go and I am ready for this one to just be over with already. I am just over it.
This past week, Thursday - Saturday were my bad days. Better than last week, seeing as I was only hurting 3/7 days this week. It still sucks, but that means I should have Sunday - Wednesday this week, maybe. If I am lucky. I have my heavy dose, and new cycle starting tomorrow. No telling what that may bring.
As I sit here and bitch about what is going wrong and how I am feeling, I have done a lot of reading in general in other breast cancer groups, and in reality, I think I am one of the lucky ones. I read what some of these women go through, things I have never experienced, thank god. This shit is real. The side effects are very real. I should be relieved that mine are minimal in comparison. Three more Taxol treatments to go, then on to my next chemo treatment which I am told by the nurses will be worse. Ugh. No thank you?
I am tired of being tired. I sleep 12+ hours a night, then nap nearly every day. My body is just tired. My mind is tired. I AM JUST TIRED. Let's look at the glass half full. I have 3 more of these treatments to go, then 4-5 of the next chemo treatments to go, so in reality, I am more than half way done with chemo. Yahoo! But it isn't over then. I still have my double mastectomy, radiation, and the rest of my hysterectomy to go.........and don't forget about the reconstructive surgery. All those things will take time to heal from too. So more down time, more naps and likely more sleeping.
Perhaps I shouldn't be in a hurry to retire............or maybe I should. When I am healed, recovered and past this breast cancer. Assuming Covid is a thing of the past, I can then travel. 😚
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